How to forgive or not forgive
We all know that taking revenge and wanting enemies to „epic-ally fail“ is “not right”. I mean it’s right too, but it’s not good to expect it. On the other hand it’s okay though, because, if we know about the laws of karma — and that the karma bus always comes around, may it take a bit longer, but it comes, we are in the knowledge of the bigger picture, and that’s not wrong either. The law of karma is a natural law. We are in the knowledge of natural laws, so it’s sort of a logical consequence to expect it. Like we expect the leaves to fall in autumn. It’s coming as a force of nature. I know I’m utterly contradicting my first sentence here,
but hear me out.
It’s not too bad, expecting for the natural law to occur, if we take distance from our feelings of anger and hurt, which is hard enough, because we have been experiencing and living through it.
We have been on the receiving end.
The world is full of narcissists and psychopath and we are in a collective and personal lesson of recognizing the patterns in order to protect ourselves. In our childhood we have not been tough to see and avoid these toxic individuals. Because the world silently runs on narcissist and psychopath, many of them among our own caretakers. Period.
Now the world is no more that silent. Thanks goodness we are vocalizing it and calling it out.
Toxic, jealous and vile people do what they do. They gaslight, lie, manipulate, steal and betray. They don’t believe in the law of karma obviously or they think they are an exception from it. None of these emotions and thoughts they run on, will ever make them happy, pretty, wise or otherwise enjoyable. It’s a toxic energy environment they exist in. They tend to flock to each other too, so it potentiates. Talking of higher echelons of political careers.
They don’t get prettier or happier with their energy, but at least they have the money, they stole or jerked out of others, to buy beauty surgeries and fancy attire to impress the public.
That makes them feel like “I’ve done the right thing. I am fabulous and rich, I am THE SHIT” , or what ever they think.
The rest of us, on the receiving end, must cope with having been abused, used, stolen from and tricked. We try therapies and for a long time we are often dysfunctional, because it sets our whole system out of order. We turn to spirituality, which is of great help and connects the dots. Then we one day maybe stumble upon the Hawaiian Ho‘opinopono prayer. There is the story, that the criminal acts in a Hawaiian prison have been minimized through working with it, that it heals families and societies. There is proof.
So I’m like: “let’s try this on my evil brother, who is a true psychopath and was following long term plans to push me out of the family and to grab my inheritance and become a show off with a jaguar car and fancy real estates, while I am a starving artist living in the backyard” He did it because he could, because no one ever thought he would do the things he did, too dirty, too out of the family pattern. We do not have this in the family actually. No one saw it coming. And he pulled his program through all the way.
So I would start with “I’m sorry”, the first sentence of four. In the Hawaiian ho’oponono tradition it means “I’m sorry, we have both wronged each other” …but wait, what should I be sorry for?! „I’m sorry that you were born and have destroyed our family by walking over dead bodies literally” or “l’m sorry for not having recognized who you are, until it was too late” ?
It doesn’t work this way. Or “I’m sorry that I exist, so you had to get me out of the way”? Next: “forgive me” … “forgive me for being the first born and my dads favorite, so you had to defame and character assassinate me to get on top”?
“Thank you”. This one has a really bitter taste: “thank you for opening my eyes about the evil in this world“.
Yep, it’s a karmic lesson, so thanks bro!
Finally „I love you“ … well „I once I loved you, now I am numbed to any emotion towards you, which is better than hating, right?
At least I don’t hate you. Sorry, best I can do for now“
No matter what, we don’t have to nudge ourselves to be ho‘oponopono saints, while we are still processing the hits that struck us down. Maybe one day we will grow into it. Until than it’s great to not be like them, the toxic haters and manipulators, to not cultivate the feelings they run on. And who knows, the karma bus might come around soon, it’s probably around corner already.
